animalstalkinginallcaps:

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M A “ONE-UPPER”?
I MEAN THAT YOU EXAGGERATE OR OUTRIGHT LIE, NOT ONLY TO MAKE YOURSELF SEEM FAR MORE INTERESTING THAN YOU ACTUALLY ARE, BUT ALSO OUT OF A MISGUIDED SPIRIT OF COMPETITIVENESS AND/OR ENVY. THAT YOU WILL NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO JUST ENJOY SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPERIENCES AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS BECAUSE IT ERRONEOUSLY MAKES YOU FEEL INFERIOR, SO YOU FABRICATE WIDLY IMPROBABLE TALES TO SUIT YOUR NEED FOR SITUATIONAL DOMINANCE. THAT IS WHAT I MEAN BY THAT.
I DON’T DO THAT.
I’D ARGUE, BUT I HAVE A DATE AT 5:30 AND I NEED TO GET READY.
WELL THAT’S FINE WITH ME, BECAUSE I HAVE TWO DATES AT 5:30.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M A “ONE-UPPER”?

I MEAN THAT YOU EXAGGERATE OR OUTRIGHT LIE, NOT ONLY TO MAKE YOURSELF SEEM FAR MORE INTERESTING THAN YOU ACTUALLY ARE, BUT ALSO OUT OF A MISGUIDED SPIRIT OF COMPETITIVENESS AND/OR ENVY. THAT YOU WILL NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO JUST ENJOY SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPERIENCES AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS BECAUSE IT ERRONEOUSLY MAKES YOU FEEL INFERIOR, SO YOU FABRICATE WIDLY IMPROBABLE TALES TO SUIT YOUR NEED FOR SITUATIONAL DOMINANCE. THAT IS WHAT I MEAN BY THAT.

I DON’T DO THAT.

I’D ARGUE, BUT I HAVE A DATE AT 5:30 AND I NEED TO GET READY.

WELL THAT’S FINE WITH ME, BECAUSE I HAVE TWO DATES AT 5:30.

(via baldeesh)


hermionejg:

Los seres humanos no nacen para siempre el día en que sus madres los alumbran, sino que la vida los obliga a parirse a sí mismos una y otra vez.
- Gabriel García Márquez (March 6, 1927-April 17th, 2014)[human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them, but that life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves]

hermionejg:

Los seres humanos no nacen para siempre el día en que sus madres los alumbran, sino que la vida los obliga a parirse a sí mismos una y otra vez.

- Gabriel García Márquez (March 6, 1927-April 17th, 2014)

[human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them, but that life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves]

(via whathappened)


johndarnielle:

you know what
I loved unicorns when I was eleven/twelve years old and then I learned that it was real soft and nerdy to love unicorns so I checked out of the whole unicorn-liking mindset because I felt a need to be hardening myself and copping a dark-stuff-only stance
then when I was 19 my girlfriend gave me a coffee cup with a unicorn on it and on receiving it I discovered that I had internalized some bullshit anti-unicorn stance and it made me sad
to those unicorns who didn’t get liked by me during my bullshit years: my bad, do you like carrots, I will leave a plate of carrots out by the back door, I also have oats

johndarnielle:

you know what

I loved unicorns when I was eleven/twelve years old and then I learned that it was real soft and nerdy to love unicorns so I checked out of the whole unicorn-liking mindset because I felt a need to be hardening myself and copping a dark-stuff-only stance

then when I was 19 my girlfriend gave me a coffee cup with a unicorn on it and on receiving it I discovered that I had internalized some bullshit anti-unicorn stance and it made me sad

to those unicorns who didn’t get liked by me during my bullshit years: my bad, do you like carrots, I will leave a plate of carrots out by the back door, I also have oats

(via paulftompkins)


Avengers Tarot by juliacross/菊叔

(via 40yr-old-fangirl)


larrycoincidences:

do you ever have a plan for the day and suddenly it’s 4pm and you’ve achieved literally nothing 

(via angrypalemexican)


(via baldeesh)



(via inturnaround)


daveholmes:

Man, I want to give this defense of “RuPaul’s Drag Race” a fair shake, but don’t come at me with fish puns, “hot mess,” and impersonations of Rachel Zoe and then tell me how punk you are. Don’t take credit for being provocative and transgressive if you’re still giggling at the phrase “big pink furry box” in 2014. Provoke! Transgress! 
If nonstop self-congratulatory vagina jokes are punk, Chuck Lorre is GG Allin.
Be better. Listen.

daveholmes:

Man, I want to give this defense of “RuPaul’s Drag Race” a fair shake, but don’t come at me with fish puns, “hot mess,” and impersonations of Rachel Zoe and then tell me how punk you are. Don’t take credit for being provocative and transgressive if you’re still giggling at the phrase “big pink furry box” in 2014. Provoke! Transgress! 

If nonstop self-congratulatory vagina jokes are punk, Chuck Lorre is GG Allin.

Be better. Listen.


‎’Slut’ is attacking women for their right to say yes. ‘Friend Zone’ is attacking women for their right to say no.
And “bitch” is attacking women for their right to call you on it.  (via madgay)

(via adventuresinblunderland)